Ra first response!

Simon Trewin doesn't want the business, but he got back to me with an email today and that's excellent. It means you can email agents using the site Everyone Who is Anyone ... and get told to fung off. At least, you're getting through. So no ton of manure for Mr Trewin, but a bunch of flowers and lots of kisses. People with books that other people might want to buy can actually get hold of this guy.

I've got tons of agents to get through. One at a time. Could last a lifetime.

I'll blog some more about ra bliss the next time. I've done the bliss and light. Next, it's the heat!

Ra light is not ra bliss either!

While I was asking the man what ra bliss was, I also said: Wha's ra light? He did not say what the light was either, but I know the light is not ra bliss because you can get the light for ages before you get ra bliss.

It is also possible to get the light and the creepy thing (see previous post) and not get ra bliss. Because it is bright white light, I don't see how you can get the light while still looking at anything. I always get the light with my eyes closed.

I don't think flashes of light are that uncommon when you start meditating, but the light I'm talking about I started getting regularly when I was able to get my meditating up to three times a day. So you're maybe doing one and a half hours a day at this point and the light I was getting was always in the third one. I assumed at the time that this was because I'd done the other two, but I now think the time of day might be involved as well. As it's getting dark and soon afterwards seems to be a great time for ra bliss, so it might be good for the light as well.

I think the creepy thing is more interesting than the light because it is certainly physical, and usually feels really nice. If you can feel like you're sitting there like a cobra, you have to have transcended your normal joes self a wee bit anyway. Hadn 't thought of that before.

I don't know what the light and ra bliss and the creepy thing are. They might be aspects of the same thing or bits of something, or whatever.

Sometime the creepy thing might seem to have straightened out and then if you have your eyes shut, you might find yourself sitting as if in a strip light, or in the middle of one of those light swords in Star Wars. You might also in this condition feel a lot of updraft, as if something (the ligtht, creepy thing, and ra bliss combined?) is pulling you up, stetching or lifting you.

I asked the man what is was that was pulling me up and he didn't tell me what that was either

I have sent Simon Trewin a letter. I have told him about my website It's here
It would be nice to know what to do now. How many days should you wait before you decide the bastards aren't going to reply? As soon as I've gone through all the email addresses for PFD, a ton of manure from CrapRUs will be on its way!

Ra bliss which uppeth creepeth!

Wha is ra bliss? I once asked the man. He did not tell me what ra bliss was, but it changes and it depends on other things. There are different kinds of ra bliss.

Do not be freaked by the creepy thing shoving around in your body when you are sitting with the straight back. This might be the start of ra bliss, or the bliss might be able to attach somehow to the creepy thing. The creepy thing is not quite under your control and it seems to be pushing sometimes at an envelope which isn't quite matching your body shape; there's more out in front of your neck and face. But in the beginning, the creepy thing kind of wriggles just under your skin on your shoulders and at the back of your neck. It seems to be pushing your body into alignment: shoulders back, chest up, lift up. This feels a bit freaky at first, but is quite pleasurable.|


I looked up kundalini arousal/incident/disaster on the web a while ago and this juju isn't really for everyone. Make you ill, burn out your brain and kill you. But all this is for free, so what the hell.

It ripples under you skin in snakelike waves. A bit of a massage. Makes you sit up like a cobra. Yes, this must be the serpent power itself.

I don't think this is ra bliss. Ra bliss might linger around in there somehow, but I think the light might come before ra bliss. This is with your eyes closed and mumbling your mumbo jumbo, whatever mumbo jumbo you want to mumble.

More later on ra bliss because everyone should get ra bliss.

Even the agents who don't reply to their emails should be ra bliss.

Ra Data Transfer Disaster!

Fung links don't work on the site sometimes. Barry Graham got in touch. His site is here and it works. Got a message saying data transfer allocation ran out and the thing would stop for an hour. What is all this? I've asked Yahoo. I suspect this free site hosting may be the phonus balonus.
Got a message about this site
I saw this band's first gig. The site looks great! The band member who did the site is only about ten. I was thinking of offering him a deal to build a page. Kids are dead cheap. I could offer him one percent of all the money the page makes until he makes ten grand. Could be a thousand grand. I could offer him a million. I think I'll have to ask his mum. Whatever happened to young people?

Thought Simon Trewin might have emailed today to say I should wait for how long, your links don't work anyway, ya prat! But nothing. I think you can set the fire brigade on people, can't you?

Brilliant bliss this evening. Much better than this morning. Somebody knows about these timings. Must be something to do with your biorhythms and the length of day. Or horses frolicking on the moon. Be something to do with something anyway. In future, I'll write a lot more about ra bliss. Ra bliss, ra bliss.

Ra missed opportunity of a lunchtime!

I decided to give Robert Kirby of PFD another chance. I was going to send him a letter, but while looking for the agency's address, I came across a profile for Simon Trewin. It's here.
He emailed me yesterday. I think someone who has books which people actually want to buy should get him. Well, get him as an agent. If anyone would like to get a subscription to We Love Animals for Robert Kirby, be my guest. I've sent the letter to Simon Trewin instead.


After three weeks of this web page being up, no agents have been seduced into clicking anything on there at all.

Had fun chatting to someone at work about the retreat (It was only a week ago!). After you tell them about staring at the floorboards all morning, they tend to look at you twice. Are you pulling their leg? Telling them about being empowered to turn into a dude with four heads and a thousand arms is always going to be a laugh. Pulling two legs and you've still got plenty of arms left.

It's Wednesday afternoon. No work till next Monday. I should really get back to writing the novel I'm working on, but concentrating on growing some more arms would be more useful. How many writers can say they've got four heads. Even only when nobody else is looking. Hotboy. John McKenzie

Ra RSPCA are coming to get you!

Simon Trewin from PFD sent me an email to say that you should wait a month. That was extremely nice of him. He could have done nothing. If he had done nothing, the RSPCA would be on their way to Robert Kirby's office, searching for the sexually molested chihuachua ... whatever that wee dog is called. Am I getting a message about Robert here? Is Simon the only one there who likes him? Anyway, you can't wait a month for someone who won't answer in the first place. I think I'll give Robert the sack.

I'm supposed to advertise my web page, I suppose. So here it is .LINK


Barry Graham says he gets to the top of google because he writes Barry Graham a lot. I never write John McKenzie. I'll sign the blogs John McKenzie. There, that's three John McKenzies in a row. Piece of cake this bloggy stuff.

Excellent meditations today every time I had a go. Wakened up before the alarm at six and that one was a beauty. Big difference to before the retreat. It's bound to start getting really weird soon. The bit after the vase breath is really like a very different space. You've jumped the fence. It's this part which seems to be getting reinforced somehow. Who knows how anything. John McKenzie. See? John McKenzie four times. Dearie me.

Rat Googly Feeling!

Found myself on Google. Well, this blog. If I'd called this John McKenzie's Wonderful Writings! instead of RaBlissBlog, I could have got a Google entry with the page name. I need professional help.

Found out that this is funny page stuff and it's one of them html things. I'm going to make a link now. Yes, I am. Link If you click that, you go to America. Far out.

I have failed to get Robert Kirby, of the agents PFD, to answer my email even just to say fung off. So I have sent an email to everyone on the email list at PFD telling them that Robert is not answering my email and that if he doesn't answer by tomorrow night, I'm going to email the RSPCA, saying he's got a chihuahua which he keeps in his desk for immoral purposes. They'll be able to watch the men in the uniforms go into his office to investigate him. So they will.


Today was my first day back at work. Someone sat beside me and asked what I'd been doing during my holidays. I said there was this nice shiny floor and I stared at a join in the floorboards for about five hours one morning. But not five hours straight. I had to get up to do stretchy stuff every now and again. Then the powerpoint presentation stopped the chat. Convincing someone that I was completely off my head wouldn't be that difficult.

First day back at work. Check levels. Bliss way up. Can get some heat on. It would be great if you could fry an egg on the palm of your hand. Save you a fortune in cooking bills!

Ra first hole in the wall

Somebody seems to have read one of the books on the webpage. The webpage is at www.geocities.com/madyamika2000/index.html

It was not Brian Wilson who wants to be my agent. He has never actually read any of the books. It was an old university friend of mine. She has offered me a lot of money to get the book off the net, but, what the hell, we should all be willing to go to jail.

The site statistics say 55 contacts have been made to the site. I don't know how many of them will have been human beings.

No agents have so far looked at the page, so there's no one to libel yet!

Ra totally nothing happening!

No nothing yet from the webpage. No emails, no nothing. It's about a fortnight since I set it up and not to be rich and famous so far is deeply disapointing. I put the title of the page and the title of the blog into google and got fung all. This world wide web stuff is going to be trickier than I thought.

No emails from R. Kirby from PFD particularly. So I sent him two emails to ask him to look at the page and he hasn't done so. Should I send round my friends in the Gambino family to have a word? Some peoople will take a limb for just fifty quid. I wonder how much you'd have to pay to get his wee finger removed. Anybody out there want to make a fiver?

The only person who has sent in comments to this page is Brian Wilson. He wants to be my agent. I don't think this is a good idea while he's still taking his clothes off in public, but in a couple of weeks time this might seem like the only offer and who knows?

I sent an email to Simon Pia who works for the Scotsman. I used to know a cat once who had a cousin that lived next door to him. I think this means that I've started networking.

As far as ra bliss is concerned, it is sometimes a wee bit difficult to come out of these retreats, and I've just stayed in today. But I meditated about three hours before two o clock and it seems that I can raise some heat still. A week sitting quietly doing nothing has really brought it on. This makes me the most fortunate of fortunate creatures. If I had to chose between a million pounds and being able to do these meditations, I have to chose the million pounds. No, that's the wrong way round!

The only blog I've read before I started writing this one was on Barry Graham's web page. Barry should be totally famous. I don't know why he isn't. He lives an authentic, heroic existence somewhere in a wood near Chattanooga, Tennessee. I sometimes wonder if this reminds him of the idyllic, peaceful little village he hails from near Glasgow in Scotland, called Maryhill.

I'm going to see if I can make a link to Barry's page. Except I don't know how to. Type Barry Graham into google and he comes right up first. I wonder how he did that?

Back to Edinburgh!

Got back from the Samye Ling a couple of hours ago. Didn't have a conversation lasting more than a minute over the entire week until I was leaving today. Meditating maybe ten hours a day for seven days. Felt very calm when I was leaving the place today. Unusually calm.

The afternoons are not the best times to meditate if you're doing the inner heat juju and I thought I'd waste some time blogging on this and sending emails to people, so the cafe shut. I thought when I went there that I'd be spending all week in the really beautiful temple they have, but it was closed more or less all day for sixteen days. They've got a practice bit at the back which I'd never really meditated in before ... not sure if I was allowed, that kind of thing. So I went in there.

Wonderful place with a shiny wooden floor you can do Tai Chi sets on. It was often empty.

But it wasn't one of the best weeks of my life. I didn't feel so joyous or exhilerated as I have felt when I've stayed there for a week before. Can't complain about how the meditations went though. In the evening I did go into the temple and waited for the Chenrezig prayers at seven. I was more blissed out than I'd ever been every night. Sometimes dazed with bliss. I got a nano second view once of what it might be like to be able to actually do Deity Yoga as opposed to trying to do it. That's the way the bliss started. Tiny glimpse. Comes slowly towards you. Then one day you can close your eyes and there it is.

I'm very tired! Deity yoga is a very wonderful and strange thing. Raising inner heat has to be some kind of indicator as to how utterly, profoundly ignorant I am and we are. What don't we know? We don't even know what we don't know.

I don't believe in things. I come from a rational, deeply skeptical point of view. I want to investigate technique. You do this and this happens. It's nothing to do with God or religion. It's nothing to do with being holy or pious. It's about the human beings. It's the mind game. But Deity Yoga and Guru Yoga are just blowing me away. Ra bliss, ra bliss, ra bliss.

I think I started this blog to record how I failed to get an agent and not make any money at all, but really who cares? I don't think agents inherently exist anymore.

Still ra Samye Ling blog

Checked the web page at www.geocities.com/madyamika2000/index.html
Still the same. It's still there. Nobody has sent me any email from it and my pal, Brian Wilson, has told me that it's not on the MSN register of nutty people with cunning plans to get rich and even infamous. Of course, I know bugger all about this.

Still, I sent a hassling email to a Robert Kirby at PDF to tell him to look at the page. He looks from his photie a bit like Charlie Sheen, the actor, or maybe like one of those people in American Psycho. Maybe if I got an agent it would be better if it was a man since I am not really all that interested in the writing business (apart from writing) and if I had a male agent, I could occasionally have a reason to go to London and get out of my face.

Be a change from this here at the wonderful Samye Ling.

The trouble is keeping my enthusiasm for getting an agent going. I don't really need the money and I've had books published before. Having books published is a hassle. People you don't know sometimes write about you in the papers. And I don't need the money. If I'd wanted to make money, I might have become a literary agent!

However, I should get some money so I could give it to my daughter. She's going to university this yearI'd also like to give pots of dosh to the Samye people since this place has given me more than I could ever repay. Apart from that, I wouldn't mind going to Rumtek. I'd like to see the 17th Karmapa in Rumtek, although I don't think he's ever been there yet. I went to the Himalayas before, but it was too cloudy to see any mountains! I think I'll start doing the lottery.

I've just got out of lying down in my room, but the coffee is waking me up.

This morning I meditated for about four hours in the practise bit at the back of the temple. Straight into ra bliss really. Heat came up with practically the first vase breath. I stood on my head a couple of times and did Tai Chi sets when I had to change position due to the sore legs.

I was reading the D. Lama's book on The Union Of Bliss and Emptiness. The visualisations in it are astonishing. Being able to do something like that (especially with your eyes open!) would be wonderful. You'd need to be in retreat some time, I imagine. I can't do these things (yet?), but I have done the mental calming sufficiently before to realise that your mind becomes quite plastic in terms of the visual field after a while. It's like reverse acid. Instead of something appearing spontaneously, you can stick it out there and it'll stay out there.

I don't believe in anything. Well, I believe in the illusory nature of reality. That's all. Actually, that covers everything; any reality you care to mention. It's just at best a view, I suppose.

Two peak experiences yesterday.One was lying on my bed after lunch doing yoga nidra i.e lying like a corpse. Very blissful. Not just lying there being relaxed. In the evening they have Chenrezig prayers. It was a Chenrezig empowerment I got the first night here. I wasn't going to float. I know I'm not going to float. It felt as if I was going to float. A very blissful, light feeling. Brought on by listening to chanting.

I'm out of time here. Half an hour for 50p. Got to be a good deal. It's wonderful to be here!

Ra Samye Ling

I'm on day 3 of a week long retreat here at the Samye Ling Monastery and Tibetan Cultural Centre. This is the most wonderful place and it is in Scotland. I logged onto the internet today to see if anything was happening with the page I set up to attract money, sorry, an agent or publisher for my wonderful writings. Of course, if they were that wonderful ....
The web page (www.geocities.com/madyamika2000/index.html) has received 53 hits since it was set up last week and I have no idea what that means. Hardly anybody knows about it and no one emailed me. At the moment I'm working on an agent from PFD . Well, I sent him an email inviting him to get even richer by looking at my page, but he probably deleted the bugger without looking at it. But I'll get a no from everyone sooner or later.

Actually, find it hard to care at the moment.

I'm on the bottom rung of the great Vajrayana and I'm down here to let the blessings of the great Kagyu masters sink through my bones. But I'm not a very good Buddhist really. I like meditating and the Buddhists have the skillful means. I'm not very compassionate and tend to call folk who don't meditate flatheids. This isn't very buddhist, but most people have completely flat heads and don't even know it.

My head inflates a bit down here. The first couple of days are usually a bit tough what with the no telly, radio, papers, drugs and what all else. I don't really have conversations with people down here either.

The happiest times of my life have been spent here. Two weeks: one last October when I came down here with a tent and the summer before that when I had a room for a week.

After a few days of doing little else but meditate, do Tai Chi sets and reading, and eating, it starts to kick in: ra bliss. Ra bliss sometimes feels as if it inflates your whole body. I feel silly sometimes talking to flatheids about ra bliss because people who don't meditate are never goingto get it.

The machine is about to go phut. I'll go and meditate! Hotboy

Ra why oh why!

I'm new to blogging. The reason why I set this blog up (if I have!) is to track the progress made with the web page I have just set up to try to attract a literary agent. There are six unpublished novels and one unproduced play free to download on this page. It is at www.geocities.com/madyamika2000/index.html
Anyway, I started today using the web page Everyone Who Is Anyone... to contact someone at the PFD agency.

Also, I'd like somewhere to post stuff about meditation and the development of ra bliss, ra rapture and ra ecstasy! I'm going on a retreat for a week in two days and could blog from there if I can get this to work!