Rose Karmic Bonds!
Wednesday 3:50 p.m.
What with having the afternoon off work .... in order to facilitate the Beer Monster Reduction Programme ...another four days with no beer, Jack! One day at a time, Hotboy! ... I set off looking for the Honeyblend Herbal Smoking Mixture. You don't want to know why. Anyway, I'm standing at the counter when someone says excuse me. Whilst waiting for the Medicine Buddha empowerment last Friday, someone said exactly the same thing. Then said it a bit later. And, lo!, it was the same babes! She was wanting by me to get behind the counter. She works there. I had to look three times. Actually, I looked about eight times, but she was engaged in some task and didn't look up.
When I've got the face transplant, the set of Sean Connery/Clint Eastwood gnashers and I'm back to my fighting weight, I'll go back there again. I'll make sure I get served by her.
Can I help you?
Em, (I look a bit quizzical) have you had a Medicine Buddha empowerment?
Why, yes! How did you know?
After a while, you can tell.
That last line is a killer, Jack. You have to be a buddhist to know what a killer line that is. But after that, I'm a bit stuck. She's bound to ask me what I want. What will I say?
And what can I get you?
A packet of strawberry flavoured condoms, please.
You see, Jack! It might be a bit too early in the relationship for a line like that. Anybody out there know of a killer line to follow the first killer line?
When I sat up this morning to start my meditations, there was so much of ra bliss that I couldn't really go through my normal juju routine. I just succumbed to ra bliss. It was so profound and wonderful. This is all of three seconds after you've sat up. A gobsmacking start to the day!!
There is a great auspiciousness in the air just now. It's a shame you can't do anything about people being too dumb to meditate. But there it is. I'm off to the allotment!
9:36 p.m.
A strange person asked me what an empowerment was. Buggered if I know. Juju. They say there's an unbroken line of transmission from the original Buddha traceable down to the joe who's giving you the empowerment, and he's supplying the juice. They say you need them to do tantric stuff, etc., blah, blah, google it. You don't need an empowerment to do the Medicine Buddha sadhana, which is the visualisations and general juju that goes along with it. The strange person could start doing this sadhana at the same time as moi. The book I have is on the net. Free. Then we could levitate together! And what a perfect position he is in! Hasn't even got a proper job! Unfortunately, too dumb to meditate. Dearie me!
I think this is the way it's supposed to work ... grief, sorrow, lamentations ... suffering in this life ... and generally afflictive emotions going chop chop bang bang non-stop ... caused by a false sense of self. Accept your fundamental ignorance and the illusory nature of reality. Enter the deity! Imagine yourself as a deity and this illusion should weaken the first illusion, which is what is funging you up. The afflictive emotions should dissipate. You would be left with a happy, smiley face.
The spam robots only want to hear about ra bliss, Hotboy. Well, Jack, the name of the game is to be able to collect the Four Blisses, it seems. I had an amazing time in ra bliss this morning, but I am nowhere near collecting even the first bliss, said to be the absolutely, amazing and truly fabulous dose of ra bliss. We spam robots .... is there more than one talking spam robot, Jack? .... We spam robots think that human existance sounds like a load of crap apart from ra bliss, Hotboy. Damn right, Jack! Damn right!
What with having the afternoon off work .... in order to facilitate the Beer Monster Reduction Programme ...another four days with no beer, Jack! One day at a time, Hotboy! ... I set off looking for the Honeyblend Herbal Smoking Mixture. You don't want to know why. Anyway, I'm standing at the counter when someone says excuse me. Whilst waiting for the Medicine Buddha empowerment last Friday, someone said exactly the same thing. Then said it a bit later. And, lo!, it was the same babes! She was wanting by me to get behind the counter. She works there. I had to look three times. Actually, I looked about eight times, but she was engaged in some task and didn't look up.
When I've got the face transplant, the set of Sean Connery/Clint Eastwood gnashers and I'm back to my fighting weight, I'll go back there again. I'll make sure I get served by her.
Can I help you?
Em, (I look a bit quizzical) have you had a Medicine Buddha empowerment?
Why, yes! How did you know?
After a while, you can tell.
That last line is a killer, Jack. You have to be a buddhist to know what a killer line that is. But after that, I'm a bit stuck. She's bound to ask me what I want. What will I say?
And what can I get you?
A packet of strawberry flavoured condoms, please.
You see, Jack! It might be a bit too early in the relationship for a line like that. Anybody out there know of a killer line to follow the first killer line?
When I sat up this morning to start my meditations, there was so much of ra bliss that I couldn't really go through my normal juju routine. I just succumbed to ra bliss. It was so profound and wonderful. This is all of three seconds after you've sat up. A gobsmacking start to the day!!
There is a great auspiciousness in the air just now. It's a shame you can't do anything about people being too dumb to meditate. But there it is. I'm off to the allotment!
9:36 p.m.
A strange person asked me what an empowerment was. Buggered if I know. Juju. They say there's an unbroken line of transmission from the original Buddha traceable down to the joe who's giving you the empowerment, and he's supplying the juice. They say you need them to do tantric stuff, etc., blah, blah, google it. You don't need an empowerment to do the Medicine Buddha sadhana, which is the visualisations and general juju that goes along with it. The strange person could start doing this sadhana at the same time as moi. The book I have is on the net. Free. Then we could levitate together! And what a perfect position he is in! Hasn't even got a proper job! Unfortunately, too dumb to meditate. Dearie me!
I think this is the way it's supposed to work ... grief, sorrow, lamentations ... suffering in this life ... and generally afflictive emotions going chop chop bang bang non-stop ... caused by a false sense of self. Accept your fundamental ignorance and the illusory nature of reality. Enter the deity! Imagine yourself as a deity and this illusion should weaken the first illusion, which is what is funging you up. The afflictive emotions should dissipate. You would be left with a happy, smiley face.
The spam robots only want to hear about ra bliss, Hotboy. Well, Jack, the name of the game is to be able to collect the Four Blisses, it seems. I had an amazing time in ra bliss this morning, but I am nowhere near collecting even the first bliss, said to be the absolutely, amazing and truly fabulous dose of ra bliss. We spam robots .... is there more than one talking spam robot, Jack? .... We spam robots think that human existance sounds like a load of crap apart from ra bliss, Hotboy. Damn right, Jack! Damn right!
posted by Hotboy at 3:50 PM
12 Comments:
Hotboy, It has been my experience that women prefer a man to be straight forward but polite. I don't think that there are any killer lines.
Getting a woman's attention is not difficult. Keeping it is another story.
Toyo! I'll take your word for it. After centuries of monogamy, what would I know? But you get killer lines in good dialogue! Hotboy
I used the Honeybunch to help me give up tobacco. I'm assuming it was the tobacco, not the Honeyblend that caused the cancer. I used to smoke it in pubs last century, freaked out a publican.
I think I can imagine why you're using it. Bing Crosby had a co-star.
In a previous century, "excuse me" was an invitation to dance, and it doesn't take an ayatollah know what that could lead to. Do they sell herbal viagra?
If you could tell us what a Medicine Buddha empowerment is, that would help us help.
PS apols for being awol.
PPS surely this post is an opening page for a book?
Sigimund! It's you! Bing Crosby had a co-star called Dorothy Lamore, which rhymes with ... it is your one tracked mind, Siggie!! Sex, sex, sex! Hotboy
Maybe I am a wee bit tired today (actually I am) but I am a little lost on your post...think I will try meditating, will that help?
Rob, you are cracking me up!
Lee Ann. It's the lack of beer. Hotboy. p.s. but the desire is diminishing!
Take her some homegrown onions and tell her about the layers as an illustration of consciousness. She can't fail to be impressed.
Ion: Since she seems to work in a herbalist that's bound to work! Just need the burqua and a liposuction and I can't wait! Hotboy
As usual I am baffled but charmed by your post, and tickled by the banter between you and Rob. Humour, charm and a large shot of eccentricity (well alright a small shot)...works for me in the holding of attention stakes and Bing's mate always helps if nerves are getting in the way!
Lelly: How nice to hear from you again!The sound of birdsong in your wood must be something else in the morning at this time of year! Hotboy
My former colleagues at the Burger Institute tell me that desire is always diminishing, they call it entropy. Don't fight it! I did, and look what happened to me.
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