Friday, June 17, 2005

Ra Friday!

11:05 a.m.
So well was ra bliss working last night that I sat up against the wall instead of going under the duvet. All you really have to do is sit with a straight back and that's it. Hello, ra bliss. Or something at the start of ra bliss. Just sitting and you can feel something anyway. I can't get near describing ra bliss at the moment. Soon ....

I usually go to see my mother and my auntie Kathy on Fridays. But today they have gone out visiting someone else. This someone else is equally old and bits of her are falling off. Her family has gone away and she lives alone. She is dying of loneliness. Or grief, sorrow, lamentations ... suffering in this life. In fact, the usual flatheid. God preserve us from the flatheids.

Instead of sitting against the wall last night and getting into ra bliss, I did consider going out for a bottle of plonk and getting boohoo. My trouble is that I like everything. There really isn't much I've said no to. Temptation, hmmm?

AP Watt is a big agency, I think. I don't know if it's one of the six big killer agencies you have to be with, but I think it's at least dead old. I should have jumped at sending them three chapters. Maybe it was because I'd given up that ruse in my head before I got the contact, but I think I know if I get an agent all kinds of hassles will start. Do I need the incoming at the moment? I think not. End of break.

1:40p.m.
Further increase in everything before lunch. At one point I thought I almost had a bit of an emantation in a mandala. Of course, this doesn't seem to be working the way I was expecting. I thought you'd do the calm mind and gradually add bits. Like, start with the nose or whatever. But when you do the breaths and start going into the different zone, then it seems is when the deity yoga is appropriate. In the weird zone you've kind of transcended anyway.

Of course, if I was in a retreat situation with some Tibetan chums, I could just ask. I've never quite got the positioning right. When I was thirty, I was trying to re-write Alma Mater and I thought I should be a writer-in-permanence somewhere. Maybe an American college where I could just concentrate on the book. But I was doing a full time job, trying to write for radio, and training my body to a frazzle.

Asceticism is purity in the midst of impurity. I'm no very good at that. Thank God I'm in this cave up the side of a volcano and no down there with the penguins and the Pelican Peculiar!


11:10p.m.
Thank god for penguins! One breached the lip of the cave entrance and left three bottles of the Pelican Peculiar! There was a note. Slowlee slowlee catchee fishee, it said. But today was like no other for ra bliss.... ra bliss... ra bliss!

1 Comments:

Blogger onan the bavarian said...

good move, apologising to eric once you realised he was in the Canadian military, before he could get around to reading your blog items about guns and high noon, and take it as a challenge. I wasn't so smart - I emailed him a full UnHeard Islands welcome before I read his profile. If he turns up armed on the island, I'll deny everything and direct him to your cave. I can video the shootout through the telescope if you like.

1:52 AM  

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