Ra How Not To!
Thursday 6:10 p.m.
I'm in a hiatus, the bit between having written something and wondering if you should try to write something else. In my heart of hearts, I know I should just stop, but I've known that for about ten years and I haven't stopped yet.
As I was meditating this morning, my mind was flooded with lots of instances of how not to become a rich and famous writer. On the other hand, it could be looked on as a route map towards ra bliss. But if you want to be thick, stupid, smug, fat, writing basturn, don't do any of these!
1) Don't say no when you're offerred a chance to help write the Archers. This would have led to other things. It's called hack work. A guy I know now gets £750 every time River City (a Glasgow soap) is shown even although he doesn't write it. It's called a format fee.
2) Don't write to your producer on the radio and tell him you don't want to write radio plays anymore. (I'd been having a problem with this wonderful joe and right in the middle of it, I got a phone call telling me my brother had broken his back, and I thought why get wound up with this trivial shit?)
3) Don't get bought lunch by the editorial director of one of the biggest paperback companies (who'd just published your novel) and tell him that no, you can't write him a set of similar novels at eighteen month intervals because you have a baby to look after.
4) Don't, once you've been invited to a seminar about writing for the BBC television joes, tell them that you don't really want to write for the telly; you were only there because they told you you'd get expenses, and you wanted to see who the other writers were.
5) If you get invited to meet with one of the biggest theatrical agents in London, don't show up pissed and proceed to roll joints on the office filing cabinet. (That was my best moment!)
6) Don't tell the new Artistic Director of the Traverse that no, you don't want to meet him if he doesn't want the script you've just sent him. (That was Philip Howard, who is due to leave the job next year after, what I'd call, ten superbly successful years in charge!)
You've got to laugh! Anyway, you don't want to spend your life crawling up folks' arses, do you? After having written the totally unpublishable novel once called Let's Kill Fatboy, which isn't like any other kind of novel, but might actually be a wee help to the flatheids, what should I care! We're not starving here. This is a gust from evil bourgeoisville!
There were more raspberries to eat in the allotment today. It was such a nice, sunny day that I went to the Botanics to meditate under a moulting tree in the autumnal sun. What a fortunate, fortunate creature I am!
I'm in a hiatus, the bit between having written something and wondering if you should try to write something else. In my heart of hearts, I know I should just stop, but I've known that for about ten years and I haven't stopped yet.
As I was meditating this morning, my mind was flooded with lots of instances of how not to become a rich and famous writer. On the other hand, it could be looked on as a route map towards ra bliss. But if you want to be thick, stupid, smug, fat, writing basturn, don't do any of these!
1) Don't say no when you're offerred a chance to help write the Archers. This would have led to other things. It's called hack work. A guy I know now gets £750 every time River City (a Glasgow soap) is shown even although he doesn't write it. It's called a format fee.
2) Don't write to your producer on the radio and tell him you don't want to write radio plays anymore. (I'd been having a problem with this wonderful joe and right in the middle of it, I got a phone call telling me my brother had broken his back, and I thought why get wound up with this trivial shit?)
3) Don't get bought lunch by the editorial director of one of the biggest paperback companies (who'd just published your novel) and tell him that no, you can't write him a set of similar novels at eighteen month intervals because you have a baby to look after.
4) Don't, once you've been invited to a seminar about writing for the BBC television joes, tell them that you don't really want to write for the telly; you were only there because they told you you'd get expenses, and you wanted to see who the other writers were.
5) If you get invited to meet with one of the biggest theatrical agents in London, don't show up pissed and proceed to roll joints on the office filing cabinet. (That was my best moment!)
6) Don't tell the new Artistic Director of the Traverse that no, you don't want to meet him if he doesn't want the script you've just sent him. (That was Philip Howard, who is due to leave the job next year after, what I'd call, ten superbly successful years in charge!)
You've got to laugh! Anyway, you don't want to spend your life crawling up folks' arses, do you? After having written the totally unpublishable novel once called Let's Kill Fatboy, which isn't like any other kind of novel, but might actually be a wee help to the flatheids, what should I care! We're not starving here. This is a gust from evil bourgeoisville!
There were more raspberries to eat in the allotment today. It was such a nice, sunny day that I went to the Botanics to meditate under a moulting tree in the autumnal sun. What a fortunate, fortunate creature I am!
posted by Hotboy at 6:16 PM
8 Comments:
Entertaining post, and a big help. This could be a whole new blog genre.
I hope you enjoy your hiatus.
So, you have thoughts flooding through your head while meditating. I didn't realize that would happen.
5) If you get invited to meet with one of the biggest theatrical agents in London, don't show up pissed and proceed to roll joints on the office filing cabinet. (That was my best moment!) ... sounds like a moment to be proud of! You are a brave soul sweet Hotboy!
Enjoy your raspberries. That sounds good.
Our temperature is dropping and the leaves are starting to change colors and drop from the trees! My favorite time of the year.
Have Ra Bliss!
~xo
Have to admire the resistance to selling out. Would you have been proud of the Archers? Maybe your next piece should be about your uncareer, which would doubtless be both amusing and informative.
I say dear fruit!
Didn't you have another moment, that you have not told us about, when you were being interviewed on the wireless, and you claimed to be a werewolf?
You could add that to your list:
Don't say you are a werewolf when being interviewed on the wireless.
MM III
Mingin'! You can be anything you like on the radio! But I'd forgotten that. I'd asked his producer for a look at the script the boy was going to work from. Thought: no way!The joe asked me why I'd written the play as a first question. I could have said because I'm a playwright. But you should have seen the look on his face! There's loads more. Don't tell the famous director, ex-National Theatre, that you don't see the point in showing him your play because someone else had asked to see it first (and they'd never directed a stage play!)Talk about gaining friends and influencing people! Hotboy
While my guard was down due to jet lag, somebody stole my password and left a disrespectful comment in your previous post. If I can find the person, would you like me to deal with them?
I think their advice about copying and pasting was referring to the vase breathing posts, not the good stuff like this. But whatever. It all helps.
Purchasing memory is such a time consuming process... You have to search online for prices, sort through which ones are legit, around a bunch of stores,compare prices, finally buy your memory, and then constantly pray that the price doesn't drop in the next month or so.
I've been done in by some ridiculous price drops in the past... especially this one time when I bought a Micro SD card for my DS flashcard at what apparently was a bargain price, only to later see that it had dropped by $5 in a week.
(Posted by NewPost v2 for R4i Nintendo DS.)
Electronic memory is something that I seem to be unable to ever have enough of. It's as if megabytes and gigabytes have become an inseparable part of my every day existence. Ever since I bought a Micro SD Card for my NDS flash card, I've been on the constant lookout for large memory at low prices. It's driving me crazy.
(Submitted by Nintendo DS running [url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0TA58lFC0gE]R4i SDHC[/url] rrPost)
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