Ra Answer to Pet Bereavements!
Sunday 8:30 p.m.
Jeff Andro was so embarrassed at getting a mention in RaBlissBlog that he has changed his name to Jeff Patton. If you live near Pheonix, Arizona, you should go and see Jeff because he looks amazing.
Jeff knows all about motors and computers, which is more than can be said about Sandy Buchandyke! Sandy says she works in a national cultural institution, which I think is blogspeak for a lap dancing club. (She says she only works in the office, but that's what they all say. Or, Ah only look efter ra towels!) Due to being brain damaged from carousing with her buchandykey chums, Sandy made a grevious error on her way out the door on Friday evening. And is now suffering terrible anxieties, no doubt, about going into work tomorrow.
Here on RaBlissBlog, we don't do anxieties. Even Jack the spam robot would have known how to react to such a supposed calamity as screwing up the whole computery system in the lap dancing joint.
What you have to do is go on the sick! Jack knows this because he has read my new book! My new book, apart from telling you all about ra bliss, also acts as a guide to malingerers everywhere, and if she had asked for a preview copy by email, she would have had no doubts whatsoever in knowing what to do come Monday morning! She would have got six months fully paid leave just like that!
Then she would have had the time to get into the far more lucrative job of being the manager of The Pet Bereavement Counselling Service. Sandy has an allotment with THREE huts on it! All she needs to do is convert one of them for moi (A one cushion conversion job! Even I could do that! I could bring my own cushion!) and then contact the Fushisushi Cosmococchi Computery Corporation to get the free hardware and software. Since they're Japanese, all she'd have to do is refer their public relations department to the one hand clapping Hotboy and they'd be falling over themselves to sponsor this gig. (I could wear their logo on my jimmy wig!). Had they but the slightest flicker of hesitation, she could refer them to Mr Adrian Weston, a man of great taste and perspicacity, and he would assured them that, yes! It was certain to become a world wide blockbusting bestseller, and they should get aboard the gravy train toute suite!
I put a bird feeder thing inside the hut today. For the wrens. I spent three hours in there today completely blootered by ra bliss. If the webcam and all that was portable, I could move from hut to hut. There will be millions of wrens in there before you know it. I could change my name to TwoHutHotboyMadyamikaSurfingTheOceansOfBLiss!
Jeff Andro was so embarrassed at getting a mention in RaBlissBlog that he has changed his name to Jeff Patton. If you live near Pheonix, Arizona, you should go and see Jeff because he looks amazing.
Jeff knows all about motors and computers, which is more than can be said about Sandy Buchandyke! Sandy says she works in a national cultural institution, which I think is blogspeak for a lap dancing club. (She says she only works in the office, but that's what they all say. Or, Ah only look efter ra towels!) Due to being brain damaged from carousing with her buchandykey chums, Sandy made a grevious error on her way out the door on Friday evening. And is now suffering terrible anxieties, no doubt, about going into work tomorrow.
Here on RaBlissBlog, we don't do anxieties. Even Jack the spam robot would have known how to react to such a supposed calamity as screwing up the whole computery system in the lap dancing joint.
What you have to do is go on the sick! Jack knows this because he has read my new book! My new book, apart from telling you all about ra bliss, also acts as a guide to malingerers everywhere, and if she had asked for a preview copy by email, she would have had no doubts whatsoever in knowing what to do come Monday morning! She would have got six months fully paid leave just like that!
Then she would have had the time to get into the far more lucrative job of being the manager of The Pet Bereavement Counselling Service. Sandy has an allotment with THREE huts on it! All she needs to do is convert one of them for moi (A one cushion conversion job! Even I could do that! I could bring my own cushion!) and then contact the Fushisushi Cosmococchi Computery Corporation to get the free hardware and software. Since they're Japanese, all she'd have to do is refer their public relations department to the one hand clapping Hotboy and they'd be falling over themselves to sponsor this gig. (I could wear their logo on my jimmy wig!). Had they but the slightest flicker of hesitation, she could refer them to Mr Adrian Weston, a man of great taste and perspicacity, and he would assured them that, yes! It was certain to become a world wide blockbusting bestseller, and they should get aboard the gravy train toute suite!
I put a bird feeder thing inside the hut today. For the wrens. I spent three hours in there today completely blootered by ra bliss. If the webcam and all that was portable, I could move from hut to hut. There will be millions of wrens in there before you know it. I could change my name to TwoHutHotboyMadyamikaSurfingTheOceansOfBLiss!
posted by Hotboy at 8:31 PM
3 Comments:
As you know, I was about to set up the whole pet website with the webcam, until your blog persuaded me of the futility of all striving.
But if Sandy gets it working, we can franchise the system worldwide.
Adolf! Zeig! Unfortunately, all the people I know were born to be comfortable! And totally lack initiative. Certainly not in the slightest bit entrepreneurial! Mostly telephone sanitisers and such like! Dearie me! If I could be bothered, I'd clean up! So I would! Hope this helps! Hotboy
HAPPY HALLOWEEN...
LOVE YA,
LEE ANN
Post a Comment
<< Home